The name’s Davenport. I review games.
On a nice, quiet afternoon, there’s not much more annoying that a knock at my office door.
‘Cept maybe someone kickin’ in my office door.
“KIIIII-YAH!!!” says the fella, all dressed in fancy silk and carryin’ a sword.
“Um… Can I help you?” I says.
“IMMACULATE REVIEW COPY DELIVERY STRIKE!” he says, spinning around and throwing a book across the room, landing it neat as you please on my desk without so much as knocking over my stapler. A nifty trick, I had to admit.
Art of Wuxia, the cover says. Okay, so that explained a few things.
“So you want me to review this thing?” I says.
“ILLUSTRIOUS CRANE RESPONSE!!!” he says, jumpin’ up onto the back of a chair and perching on one foot. “Yes, please.”
“Right…” I says. “I’ll get right on that. Can I see you out?”
“No, thank you,” he says. “RIGHTEOUS DOVE WITHDRAWAL!”
He jumps out the window and goes running through the air down the street.
I just sigh, sit back down, and open the book. Time for some Elaborate Monkey Reviewing. Or something.